More Down in the Dirt Publication Update
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Fri, Aug 13, 2:41 AM (1 day ago) |
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http://scars.tv/2021May-
Links for ordering this collection book appear on all of the links above, and will also appear in the writings section too, so any of your writing in this collection book will also see a link to this collection book in the writings section too!
https://www.amazon.com/dp/
Currently, these books are available directly through the Amazon affiliate printer in the U.S., the U.K., and to Europe – and even to Japan and Australia, and it ships to India too! (the above link is for U.S. orders.)
So check out the Scars Publication links to see what material of yours appears in these collection books, and if you’d like, order a copy today (I hear they make great gifts!), and again, thank you for being a part of the Down in the Dirt community!
Janet K.
Down in the Dirt Magazine
http://scars.tv/dirt
I have a small request to make. I want to expand my followers on all my platforms. So if you have not signed up yet for this blog, or followed me on intraframe, Twitter, Pinterest, Tumblr, or Bloglovin or listened to my podcast on Spotify please do so now.
thank you
WHERE TO LISTEN to the World According to Cosmos
Radio public c: https://radiopublic.com/the-world-according-to-cosmos-6va7D1
on PocketCasts: https://pca.st/rt1f4r4r
Thank you.
Just posted on line https://formerpeople.wordpress.com/2021/04/21/lone-foreigner-
John (“Jake”) Cosmos Aller | Lone Foreigner Hiking the Seoul City Walls An Old Man Visits His Wife’s Grave |
Down in the Dirt Updates
“Down in the Dirt” has published two of my poems.
Lone Foreigner Hiking the Seoul City Walls

A Lone foreign male hiker
In the hills above the city
Hiking along the ancient Seoul City walls
500 years after the founding
Of the city in 1492
Balancing his walk
Amid the boulders
The winter is coming
Soon he thinks
And finishes his hike
Heading to a bar
To sake his thirst
Some soju, and bulgogi
Will do the trick
He thinks to himself
Just another day
in the life
Of an unknown nameless
Foreigner in the city
Of Seoul
Part of the ten million
Naked stories
In the big city
An Old Man Visits His Wife’s Grave

An Old man
Goes to the grave
Of his beloved wife
Carrying her favorite flowers
And a guitar
Playing her love songs
As he remembers her life
Blaming it all
On the damn coronavirus Pandemic
Killing thousands every day
As politicians play games
The dead remain dead
he hears his wife’s voice
from beyond the grave
she is a corona ghost
he wishes he were there with her
as he plays his mournful love songs
he lays down for a moment
and becomes another Corona ghost
just another death that lonely day
Down in the Dirt has published the following poems over the last few years.
3 5 7 love poem
An Old Man Visits His Wife’s Grave
April 30 In Search of America 1975 – Hitch hiking Tales
Charles Bukowski Road Not Chosen
Fallen Dreams Litter the Ground
If you’ve been around
John (“Jake”) Cosmos Aller bio
Lone Foreigner Hiking the Seoul City Walls
My Name Is Nobody
Snarling Cup of Coffee
Strangeness in the Air
Unhinged Lunatic Howling at the Full Moo
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Hi there… You are getting this letter because you are a contributor to
the current issue of Down in the Dirt magazine (with writing or art), and
we wanted to let you know that the brand-new issue of Down in the Dirt was
just released! The new issue of the June 2021 issue Down in the Dirt is
v184, titled “Sprung from Grief”!
Now, there are a bunch of ways you can see this issue online. You can go
to the main scars page at http://scars.tv and see it not only in the text
listing but also as one of the cover images on the main page (right
frame). You can also go to the home page of Down in the Dirt at
http://scars.tv/dirt and click on the “see the current issue” link – and
you can even go to the link for ALL of the issues and see this issue
linked right at the top of the listing.
http://scars.tv/dirt/dirt184jun21/Spring_from_Grief.htm
And remember that until the next issue is released you can always see the
current issue at
http://scars.tv/dirt-new-issue.htm
Currently, this issue is available not only online but also available as
the print issue for sale through all of the amazon channels throughout the
The United States, the U.K., and Europe. Find it at http://scars.tv (at the
issue link, the links at this issues page AND the main page) – and the
books link at http://scars.tv/books and the CD/Book Sale page at
http://scars.tv/sale will all have links to ordering the book through
Amazon (though the scars site will only list it through the U.S. Amazon
links).
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0949H4GDD
And if you look at any writing by any writer IN this issue in the writings
section of http://scars.tv at
http://scars.tv/cgi-bin/framesmain.pl?writers you will see links to the
Internet (web page) issue (and eventually to the print issue of this
magazine too).
In the meantime, we hope you enjoy the new issue – and thank you for being
a part of the Down in the Dirt community!
Hi there… You are getting this letter because you are a contributor to
the current issue of cc&d magazine (with writing or art), and we wanted to
let you know that the brand-new issue of cc&d has just been released! The June
2021 issue of cc&d is the 28th-anniversary issue, v310, titled
“Falling”! We hope you like the issue…
Now, there are a bunch of ways you can see this issue online. You can go
to the main scars page at http://scars.tv and see it not only in the text
listing but also as one of the cover images on the main page (right
frame). You can also go to the home page of cc&d at http://scars.tv/ccd and
Click on the “see the current issue” link – and you can even go to the
link for ALL of the issues and see this issue linked right at the top of
the listing.
http://scars.tv/ccdissues/310jun21/Falling.htm
And remember that until the next issue is released you can always see the
current issue at
http://scars.tv/ccd-new-issue.htm
Currently, this issue is available not only online but also available as
the print issue for sale through all of the amazon channels throughout the
The United States, the U.K., and Europe. Find it at http://scars.tv (at the
issue link, the links at this issues page AND the main page) – and the
books link at http://scars.tv/books and the CD/Book Sale page at
http://scars.tv/sale will all have links to ordering the book through
Amazon (though the scars site will only list it through the U.S. Amazon
links).
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0949H4GBV/
And if you look at any writing by any writer IN this issue in the writings
section of http://scars.tv at
http://scars.tv/cgi-bin/framesmain.pl?writers you will see links to the
Internet (web page) issue and to the print issue of this magazine too.
In the meantime, we hope you enjoy the new issue and thank you for being
a part of the cc&d community!
NEW TO SCARS: BRAND NEW MAGAZINE ISSUES! The cc&d v310 June 2021 28th anniversary issue/book “Falling” and the Down in the Dirt v184 June 2021 issue/book “Sprung from Grief” are now available — so check out these brand new magazine issues online AND as perfect-bound paperback books!
Enjoy the Scars Publications 2020 anthology collection books — Scars released anthology collection books to show off 2020 writings and artwork, like the flash fiction collection book “2020 in a Flash” with selected flash fiction and art, and the 2020 poetry collection book “inside the box” with selected 2020 poems and art, and the 2020 short story collection book “Vote Early, Read Often” with selected 2020 short stories and art. Anthology collection books contain writing and art from accepted material in 2020 issues of cc&d magazine and Down in the Dirt, and collection books like this are truly a one-of-a-kind anthology — any collection book is also perfect to order for yourself or a gift!
Order a 2021 January-April MAGAZINE ISSUE ANTHOLOGY BOOK today! Pick up a copy of the 420-page “Excerpts from the Plague Years” from Down in the Dirt, and order a copy of the 424-page cc&d issue collection book “What Lies on the Other Side”, both mammoth collections of brand-new issues — because an issue anthology book is a great way to get several magazine issues altogether in a great volume set! Pick up a copy today!
DO NOT FORGET the annual WEEKLY DATEBOOK! This year available in two formats (if you like poetry or flash fiction), now you can pick up a copy of “the 2021 literary review date book review” of short poems, or “the 2021 flash fiction date book review” of short prose – both 146-page books by assorted writers & artists in 2020 issues of cc&d and Down in the Dirt in a 6″x9″ ISBN# 2019 weekly date book — order the poetry datebook or order the flash fiction datebook, and enjoy writing all year-’round while you plan your entire calendar year!
Check out the BRAND NEW books released recently, including the new poetry book “Saints and Sinners” by Kenneth DiMaggio, three short-story horror books marking the LAST books Scars Publications will EVER produce by Christopher E Ellington, titled “Tartarus Sauce”, “Valkyrie Elieson”, and “Gehenna Shampoo”. Peruse GREAT poetry books like “Broken Music” of poetry and short stories by Drew Marshall, and two volumes perfect for the entire year: “Every Event of the Year (Volume one: January-June)” and “Every Event of the Year (Volume Two: July-December)” — at 220 and 286 pages of poetry in 7½” x 9¼” books for holidays & events from each half of the calendar year. Check out “Kidnapped” by Rochelle Lynn Holt — and remember that you can always check the books listing for a complete and up-to-date listing of books released, or check out the CD / Books sale page for a sorted listing of the book too…
If you’re looking for your video fix, you can always check out the regularly updated Scars Video page at the art villa (highlighting videos of recent performances)! And don’t forget, you can also check out all past videos (through “scars girl” Janet Kuypers) at YouTube, Facebook, or Twitter any time!
Janet K.
Down in the Dirt Magazine
http://scars.tv/dirt
20210415 Scars just published a Down in the Dirt issue collection book with material from you!
Hi there from Down in the Dirt – we wanted to let you know that Scars Links to see all of the Down in the Dirt writings in “Excerpts from the And you can find this book any time at Scars in MULTIPLE locations. Now it Also, by the end of the business week this week, the database with your Links for ordering this collection book appears on all of the links above, https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08YM1H46Z/ Currently these books are available directly through the Amazon affiliate So check out the Scars Publication links to see what material of yours Janet K. If you for any reason have difficulty sending emails to this address, you |
Enjoy the 2021 magazine collection book from Scars Publications and Down in the Dirt magazine, with the January-April 2021 magazine issues titled “Excerpts from the Plague Years”. The author names in this listing appear as they are listed in magazine issue/books. For writings that appear in issues, the titles of their writing do not appear on this web page, but all of the names are linked to the individual issue/book that actually contains the material. To know exactly what is included in this collection book, view the listing below. All author entries are listed in this collection book as they are listed in magazine issue/books. |
3 5 7 love poem
Missing you missing me
Dreaming about you, do you dream the same
Will love you until end of time; will you remember me then?
April 30 In Search of America 1975 – Hitch hiking Tales
April 30 In Search of America 1975 – Hitch hiking Tales

When I was young and foolish
Broke and stubborn
I hitchhiked across the USA
Started in Salt Lake City
Where my greyhound bus pass
Was stolen
The station manager
Could have helped me
But refused to do so
Threaten to call the cops
When I grabbed my bags Without the stolen tags
I said
Go ahead
But I am so out of here
Wondered about Salt Lake City
Went to a bar
Found I had to buy my booze
Next door
And they would mix it for me
Had to order food too
After a bloody Mary
And a burger
I walked about town
Saw the Mormon Temple
Finally about 3 pm
It was time to hit the road
Did not look back
Ended up in Cody Wyoming
Got a room shower
Steak beer
Using my rapidly depleted cash Spent 25 dollars
Money really went far
Back in those days
A band of professional
Communist agitators
Gave me a ride
To Des Moines
Lots of weed, booze
And politics later
Got off the road
Slept outside
Next day
A beautiful woman
Drove me to near Chicago
In a red mustang
Might have been
The girl in the song
Took it easy
Digging her vibe
She invited home
But was not sure
If her estranged husband
Would welcome me
So, I am being foolish
And inexperienced with women
Did not go to her place
And always regretted
That I had lost
My chance that day
Then on to Chicago
Several rides later
Visited friends
Hit the road again
A series of uneventful rides
With truckers
And others
And a week later
I ended in New York City
Slept along the way
In cars
In truck stops
In high way rest stops
Always moving
Always going
Non stop talking
And lots of free weed
And beer
And conversation
One more memorable ride
Occurred outside Albany
On my return to Chicago
A middle age creepy looking man
Picked me up
In a brand-new Cadillac
He was he said a dynamite deliverer
For the Mafia
Went to various places
To blow up shit
He hated a lot of people
Particularly hippies from California
And Jewish people
Looking at me to confirm
That I was both
I told him that I lived in New York
And had never been to California
And although I might have looked Jewish
As I what was called back in the day
A “Jewfro”
I was not Jewish
Many years later I discovered
That I am indeed part Jewish
But then I did not know
And I felt a bit of strategic information
Might keep me alive
Then I realized that he was just jiving with me
And we relaxed
And he pulled out some weed
And beer
And we mellowed out
But I believe that he really was with the mob
Perhaps not a dynamite dealer
A real made Italian made mafia member
By Chicago
I had enough
I called my Dad
Told him what had happened
Wanted a ticket home
And he sent me a ticket
And 500 dollars
And I went home
I told him I would tell him
My tales some day
But never did
I learned so much
About my fellow Americans
And the strange vibe
That was 1975
And now it is too late
But I wanted to finally
Tell the world
Of my hitchhiking tales
In search of America 1975
Charles Bukowski Road Not Chosen
Order this writing in the book On a Rainy Day (the 2017 poetry, longer prose & art collection anthology) |
get the 298 page poem, longer prose & art collection anthology as a 6″ x 9″ ISBN# paperback book: |
|
Charles Bukowski Road Not Chosen
While reading Charles Bukowski poetry
On the metro ride home
Listening to Buddha bar music
On my oh too hip IPod
I begin to see myself as I was
Over 30 years ago when I was merely a bit player
A minor character in a Charles Bukowski poem
A wild young underemployed intellectual
Hanging out in dismal bars and dives all over Asia and California
Hanging with disreputable women and drunks and drinkers
And characters out of his kinds of haunts
A mad poet bard of the underground
A drunken poet in a drunken bum show
That nightly played in his head
Then one day I met the women of my dreams
And went down a different path
A long slow path to respectability
And now 30 years later
I am no longer a wild man
I am still a poet at heart
But I am now also a bureaucrat
In a button down suite
Doing the people’s business
Working for the Government
I’ve become the Man
Sometimes I wonder
Would I have been better off
Going down that another path
Would I have ended up
Somewhere else
Doing something else
Would I have been as happy
Would I have been as successful?
There is no answer that satisfies
The longing in my heart
For that wild thing
That still lurks beneath
It’s civilized cover
And I know that I am still
A mad poet at heart
Railing against the injustice of the world
As I work day by day in the belly of the great beast of State
I recall the ancient Chinese saying,
“Confucian during the day while Taoist rebel at night”
Playing out in my head and nightly dreams
In the true American Upper class patrician tradition
I close the book and look out the window
Get off the train, and walk slowly home
And realize I had no choice
But to take the path that I’ve trodden on
And so I put aside my misgivings
And say goodbye to my “Bukowskian”desires
For another night of domestic contentment
Was it worth it all to take the conventional path
And not take the bohemian road to hell and back
I look at my wife and realize
I had no choice, had no choice
But to follow her to the ends of the earth
And beyond by her side as we walked our path
Of shared destiny
Goodbye Charles Bukowski wherever you are
May I meet you in a bar in the next life
And figure out where we should have gone
Until then the drinks are on me.
Fallen Dreams Litter the Ground
Fallen Dreams Litter the Ground
In the fall weather
As I walk amid the falling leaves
I see the signs everywhere
Of the fall of America
The once great and mighty Empire
Everywhere signs of the fall appear
The dark skies mirror
The darkness that settled over our land
Death, destruction and random acts of chaos
Are all around us
Surrounding us with visions of doom
Nothing can stop the bloodletting
No one seems to be in charge
As the leaves fall
And the darkness descends
The fall of America continues
If you’ve been around
If you’ve been around
As much as I have
Decades of memories
Fill up your brain’s hard drive
Remembering the dead
Misremembering the living
Seeing the past fly past
Everywhere you go
Thinking about things
You did and did not do
As your life begins to fade
Sinking into lost worlds past
Seeing the ghosts
Of all you knew
Whispering Soon you will
Be joining us
Lone Foreigner Hiking the Seoul City Walls
Lone Foreigner Hiking the Seoul City Walls

A Lone foreign male hiker
In the hills above the city
Hiking along the ancient Seoul City walls
500 years after the founding
Of the city in 1492
Balancing his walk
Amid the boulders
The winter is coming
Soon he thinks
And finishes his hike
Heading to a bar
To sake his thirst
Some soju, and bulgogi
Will do the trick
He thinks to himself
Just another day
In the life
Of an unknown nameless
Foreigner in the city
Of Seoul
Part of the ten million
Naked stories
In the big city
My Name Is Nobody
My name, it is Nobody
No one cares who I am
I am just a nameless clone
In the cold, unfeeling bureaucracy
Just one of the army
Of civilians
who flood into and out of the city
Every day
A non-entity,
A ghost
A govbot
A cyber
A spook
A faceless automan
A bureaucrat
Just a grey-suited
Cog in the machinery
And no one cares
No one knows who I really am
And I am legend
Everywhere and nowhere
Just the way this modern world
All shred of humanity
Crushed beneath
The cruel wheel of society
In the cold, harsh world
There is no room anymore
For true human feelings
We are just robots, clones, machines
And so I go to work
Put on my mask
And no one hears my inner screams
And no one will ever care
Order this writing in the book Art House the 2019 poetry, flash fiction, prose and art collection anthology |
get the 214 page poetry, flash fiction, prose, & art collection anthology as a 6″ x 9″ ISBN# paperback book: |
|
Snarling Cup of Coffee

I like to start my day with a hot cup of coffee
I pound down the coffee
First thing I do every day as the dawning sun
Lights up my lonesome room
Yeah, but not just a simple cup of java Joe, but a God damn snarling sarcastic smarmy cup of coffee
I mean, – we are talking about an alcoholic, all speed ahead, always hot, always fresh, always there when I need it, angry, attitude talk to the hand Ztude, bad, bad assed, beats breaking, beatnik, bluesy, bitter, bitchy, bombs away, capitalistic, caffeinated up the ass, cinematic, communistic, Colombian grown, Costa Rican inspired, Cowabunga to the max, crazy assed, devilishly angelic, divine, divinely inspired, dyslexic, epic, extreme vetting, evil eye, expensive, erotic vision inducing, Ethiopian coffee house brewed, euphoric, freaky, freazoid, foxy, Frenched kissed, French brewed, funkified, foxy lady, graphic, GOD in my coffee, with Allah, Ganesh, Jesus, Kali, Buddha, Christians, Durga, Hindus, Mohamed, Jesus and Mo and their friend, the cosmic bar maid, Sai Babai, Shiva, Taoists, Zoroastrians, drinking my god damned coffee in Hell; growling, gnarly, happy, hard as ice, Hawaian blessed, high as a kite, hippie, hip, hipster, hip hoppy, hot as hell yet strangely sweet as heaven, jazzy, jealous, Kerouac approved, kick ass, kick my god damn ass to Tuesday, kick down the doors and take no prisoners, grown in the Vietnam highlands by ex-Vietcong, Guatemalan grown, kiss ass, illegal in every state, imported from all over the god damn world, insane, lovely, loony, lonely, lonesome, malodorous mean old rotten, motherfucking, nasty, narcotic, never whatever, never meh, never cold, not approved by the CIA, not approved by DHS, not approved for human consumption by the FDA, not your daddy’s sissified corporate cup of coffee, NOT DECAFE coffee, not your Denny’s truck driver weak as brown water cup of fake coffee, not your establishment friendly cup of coffee, Not your FBI coffee, Not FAKE Herbal coffee substitute, but a real cup of coffee, not your farmer brothers dinner crap, not made in America for Americans, not safe for work, not your Starbucks average expensive overpriced crappy corporate chain cup of coffee, Not pretentious, Not White House approved, not State Department safe, nuclear, Not Patriotic, operatic, Peets’s coffee approved, paranoid, pornographic, psychotic, pontific, politically aware, rapping, rhyming, right here, right now in River city, rock and roll up the Yazoo, sad, sadistic, sarcastic, sassy, satanic, schizoid, shitting, silly, sexy, smarmy, smelly, smooth, snarky, snarling, stupid, stinking, sweet as honey, sweat inducing, symphonic, Trump can’t handle this coffee, vengeful, Wagnerian, wicked, with nutmeg and cinnamon swirls, with a hint of stevia, with a hint of vanilla, with a hint of rum, with a hint of whisky, with a hint of cherry, with a hint of fruit overtones, with a hint of drugs spicing up the coffee, spendific, speeding, splendid, superior accept no substitutes, survived the Vietnam war, the Iraq war, the Afghan war, the first and Second Korean war, World War 11, the war on poverty, the war on drugs, the war on black people, the sexual revolution, Soulful as a summer’s night in MOTOWN- James Brown approved, TOP approved, Berkeley approved, the coffee that Jimmy Hendrix drank before he died, the coffee that Elvis drank on his last breakfast, the coffee that Barry White crooned as he drank his cup of coffee – and the coffee that made the white boy play stand up and play that funky music, the coffee that made Jonny B Goode play his guitar, and made Jonny bet the devil his soul after he drank his morning cup of righteous coffee and the coffee that make the Rolling Stones Rock and Roll, the coffee your mother warned you against drinking, the coffee that Napoleon drank when he became the Emperor of all Europe, the Coffee that Beethoven drank when he wrote the Ninth symphony, the coffee that Mozart drank as he wrote his last symphony, the coffee that Lincoln drank before he was killed, the Hemingway drank before he killed himself, the coffee that started the 60’s, and ended the 20th century, the coffee that Lenin drank as he plotted revolution, the coffee that Hitler and Stalin drank with FDR as they divided up the world after World War 11, the cup that JFK drank before he was blown away, the coffee Jerry drinks while driving in cars with random celebrities and political figures, the coffee that Jon Stewart drinks before he goes on an epic take down of some foolish politico, the cup of Arabic coffee that Sadaam drank the day he was executed, the coffee that GW and Cheney drank when they bombed Baghdad, the Indian cup of coffee that Bid Laden drank before 9-11 and just before the seals blew his ass to hell, the cup of coffee that Tiger Woods drank with his mistresses while playing a 3, 000 dollar round of golf at Sandy Lane golf course in Barbados, the last legal drug that does what drugs should do, the cup of coffee that Obama drank when he became President, Vietnamese, Vienna brew, wacky, whimsical, Whisky Tango Foxtrot, wild, weird, wonderful, WOW, Yabba dabba doo! Yada Yada yada Zappa’s favorite cup of cosmic coffee, and Zorro’s last cup of coffee, Good to the last drop rolled into one simple cup of hot coffee
As I pound down that first cup of coffee
And fire up my synaptic nerve endings with endless supplies
Of caffeine induced neuron enhancing chemicals
I face the dawning day with trepidation and mind-numbing fear
I turn on the TV and watch the smarmy newscasters in their perfect hair
Lying through their teeth about the great success the government is having Following the great leader’s latest pronouncements
I want to scream and shoot the TV and run out side Shouting
“Stop the world.
I want to get off this fucking crazy planet”
The earth does not care a whit about my attitude
It merely shrugs and moves around the Sun
In its appointed daily run
And I sit down
The madness dissipating a bit
And enjoy my second cup
Of heaven and hell
In my morning cup of Joe
Strangeness in the Air
There is a strangeness in the air
A sense of cosmic unease
Hangs silently in the purple crystalline sky
America woke up
And decided it was time
To quit following like lemmings
Over the Clift
As the pied piper chants
Stay the course, stay the course
We were like lemmings following him
Dying to save his wounded pride
Today there is that strange difference
In the air
As Americans woke up
And threw off their chains of fear
Unhinged Lunatic Howling at the Full Moon
Unhinged Lunatic Howling at the Full Moon
On the night of the blood-red super full moon
I sat in an evil, depraved godforsaken bar
Drinking drams of demented, fermented dream dew
Washed down by endless rounds of whiskey
rum, tequila, vodka, soju and of course beer
drinking with my buddies the Jack Daniels Gang
Drinking my way to Hell and beyond
Just as fast as I could
twenty damn drinks too sober
Just an unhinged lunatic
Dreaming of howling at the full moon
Watching the world walk by
Looking at all the fine-looking babes
Walking by the street
Thinking wild, erotic thoughts
Of endless wild libertine passions
When into the bar
That din of cosmic depravity
Walked the most beautiful women
In the Universe
So wild, so free
So wonderfully alive
I did not know what to do
As this vision of delight
Sauntered through the bar
In a skin-tight leather pant
Looked so fine
That my eyeballs hurt
And finally, I had to say something
So, I gathered up my manly courage
And walked up to her
And she looked at me
And instantly bewitched my soul
With a devilish grin
I lost all reason
And became a raving lunatic
Unhinged lunatic
Howling at the blood red full moon
Foaming at the mouth
A wild, free werewolf
Howling at the lunatic light
Of the blood red blue full Moon
Charles Bukowski Road Not Chosen
And Other Poems
By Jake Cosmos Aller
Published in Down in the Dirt
Charles Bukowski Road Not Chosen
John (“Jake”) Cosmos Aller
While reading Charles Bukowski poetry
On the metro ride home
Listening to Buddha bar music
On my oh too hip IPod
I begin to see myself as I was
Over 30 years ago when I was merely a bit player
A minor character in a Charles Bukowski poem
A wild young underemployed intellectual
Hanging out in dismal bars and dives all over Asia and California
Hanging with disreputable women and drunks and drinkers
And characters out of his kinds of haunts
A mad poet bard of the underground
A drunken poet in a drunken bum show
That nightly played in his head
Then one day I met the women of my dreams
And went down a different path
A long slow path to respectability
And now 30 years later
I am no longer a wild man
I am still a poet at heart
But I am now also a bureaucrat
In a button down suite
Doing the people’s business
Working for the Government
I’ve become the Man
Sometimes I wonder
Would I have been better off
Going down that another path
Would I have ended up
Somewhere else
Doing something else
Would I have been as happy
Would I have been as successful?
There is no answer that satisfies
The longing in my heart
For that wild thing
That still lurks beneath
It’s civilized cover
And I know that I am still
A mad poet at heart
Railing against the injustice of the world
As I work day by day in the belly of the great beast of State
I recall the ancient Chinese saying,
“Confucian during the day while Taoist rebel at night”
Playing out in my head and nightly dreams
In the true American Upper class patrician tradition
I close the book and look out the window
Get off the train, and walk slowly home
And realize I had no choice
But to take the path that I’ve trodden on
And so I put aside my misgivings
And say goodbye to my “Bukowskian”desires
For another night of domestic contentment
Was it worth it all to take the conventional path
And not take the bohemian road to hell and back
I look at my wife and realize
I had no choice, had no choice
But to follow her to the ends of the earth
And beyond by her side as we walked our path
Of shared destiny
Goodbye Charles Bukowski wherever you are
May I meet you in a bar in the next life
And figure out where we should have gone
Until then the drinks are on me.
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Fallen Dreams Litter the Ground
John (“Jake”) Cosmos Aller
In the fall weather
As I walk amid the falling leaves
I see the signs everywhere
Of the fall of America
The once great and mighty Empire
Everywhere signs of the fall appear
The dark skies mirror
The darkness that settled over our land
Death, destruction and random acts of chaos
Are all around us
Surrounding us with visions of doom
Nothing can stop the bloodletting
No one seems to be in charge
As the leaves fall
And the darkness descends
The fall of America continues
My Name Is Nobody
John (“Jake”) Cosmos Aller
My name, it is Nobody
No one cares who I am
I am just a nameless clone
In the cold unfeeling bureaucracy
Just one of the army
Of civilians who flood into and out of the city
Every day
A non-entity,
A ghost
A govbot
A cyber
A spook
A faceless automan
A bureaucrat
Just a grey suited cog in the machinery
And no one cares
No one knows who I really am
And I am legend
Everywhere and nowhere
Just the way this modern world
All shred of humanity
Crushed beneath the cruel wheel of society
In the cold harsh world
There is no room anymore
For true human feelings
We are just robots, clones, machines
And so I go to work
Put on my mask
And no one hears my inner screams
And no one will ever care
Strangeness in the Air
John (“Jake”) Cosmos Aller
There is a strangeness in the air
A sense of cosmic unease
Hangs silently in the purple crystalline sky
America woke up
And decided it was time
To quit following like lemmings
Over the Clift
As the pied piper chants
Stay the course, stay the course
We were like lemmings following him
Dying to save his wounded pride
Today there is that strange difference
In the air
As Americans woke up
And threw off their chains of fear
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