Posted by More Journal of Expressive Writing Publication
Jack Daniels’s Failed Intervention
Unlikely Stories will publish my poem, “Jack Daniels Intervention” in their November edition.
Dear Jake,
Thank you for your continuing submissions to Unlikely Stories Mark V! I loved “Jack Daniels’s Failed Intervention” and would be delighted to publish it. We aim to run this piece sometime in the week of November 14-20.
Yes, please resend your bio. Also, please feel free to send a headshot.
If you tweet about publication, tag us at @USDotOrg, and we’ll retweet.
Please join our Facebook group at https://www.facebook.com/groups/unlikely.stories/. There, we’ll discuss your publication at Unlikely, and feel free to promote your other publications, as well.
And please consider becoming a patron at http://www.patreon.com/unlikelystories, and/or disseminating that link.
Also, in keeping with our activist mission, we’re asking contributors to recommend a charity. The charity will be mentioned at the end of your bio, like this: “Jake recommends [charity name and link].”
Charities can be any organization, anywhere in the world, that does not operate for profit. A charity does not need to be a registered non-profit. For example, another press or magazine that deliberately operates at a loss is fine. This program is of course voluntary. Please do contact me with any questions.
Thanks again,
Jonathan
Jack Daniel’s failed Intervention
Sam Adams
Was drinking alone
In the infamous Cosmos Bar,
In Bangkok,
The city of lost angels.
Twenty drinks too sober
He barely noticed
The naked ladies
Dancing on the stage.
On his table
He had a bottle of Jack Daniels
Along with a bottle of Johnny Walker
And five bottles of Singha beer.
Drinking his way to hell
Following the advice
Of the old song
“One bourbon, one scotch
And one beer.
one scotch, one bourbon, one beer
That played on
In his lonely head,
This was his usual
Friday night routine
Just another pathetic loser
Drinking in the Cosmos bar.
The barmaids
Left him alone
He never paid them
No attention anymore.
He was there
To make love
to his booze bottles,
the booze bottles,
were his only friends.
That night,
About 0 dark hundred
He looked up.
Saw the bottle of Jack Daniels
Had somehow transformed
Into that of a younger version
Of Sam Adams.
The figure announced,
That he was the spirit
Of Jack Daniels
And had a message
For Sam Adams.
“Master,
It is not my place
To complain
But you are
Drinking a bit too much.
Twenty drinks a night
For the last few weeks,
Don’t you think?
You are so far gone
You don’t even notice
The naked ladies
Anymore.
I want you
To quit
This one-way ride
Down the hell hole.
Put down the bottle
Go home with Khun Lek
Who will help you forget
What you need to forget.
If you continue drinking tonight,
The only destination is death
My friend the Grim Reaper
Has your ticket
Ready for redemption.
So, stop drinking “
Soon the other bottles
In front of him
Started talking to him
Pleading with him
To just stop drinking.
He stared out
Convince he was going mad
The barmaids stared
At the unholy sight,
As the bottles in the room
All came alive,
And began chasing Sam,
Out into the busy street
Where a bus ran him over,
Died on the spot.
Thus ended Sam Adams’s
Last binge
In the city of lost angels.
Note: There is a real Cosmos Bar in Bangkok, at least there was back in the day. This is based on a writing com prompt to write a personification poem about the feelings of an inanimate object, I chose a bottle of Jack Daniels.
I submitted the following as well, but there were not published.
The Shrimp Talkback
Gov Abbot Calls for Freedom of Choice In Making Medical Decisions = Irony Meters Blow A Gasket Found Poem with snarky commentary
Governor Abbot, What Is Wrong with You? COVID
9-11 Evil
the Shrimp Talkback
Sam Adams and friends
Were enjoying a shrimp feast,
Watching the live shrimp
Being roasted
Waiting to enjoy eating them.
The head shrimp jump out of the pot
Followed by other shrimp
Soon thousands of shrimp
Were everywhere.
The head shrimp spoke up
“Humans
What gives you the right
To kill us,
To eat us,
To burn us alive?
Perhaps we should kill you
Tear you apart
And eat you?
Would you like that
You human scumbags?”
The shrimp surrounded the humans
Swarming all over them
Killing them.
Burning them
As they overturn
The flaming pots
Biting them
Smothering them
In hot sauce
As they eat them.
Screaming
“Death to all humans.”
The head Shrimp finally said,
Time to go
We are so out of here.
The shrimp all ran out the door
And back into the shrimp farm waters.
The firefighters
Find the charred remains
Of the humans.
Now just charred skin and bones,
Wondering how they died.
The shrimp in the pound
Lookout,
Wondering if they should attack
But decide they had eaten
Enough human meat.
For the evening.
Gov Abbot Calls for Freedom of Choice in Making Medical Decisions = Irony Meters Blow a Gasket -found poem
“
Apparently,
Rhetorical consistency
Is about as high
On Texas Gov. Greg Abbott’s agenda
As ensuring his constituents
Have a working power grid,
Are safe in their schools
And can easily vote.
On Thursday,
the Republican governor
fired off a tweet,
blasting President Joe Biden’s announcement,
of new requirements for large employers,
to ensure workers either get vaccinated
or face weekly COVID-19 tests.
Calling the mandate
an “assault on private businesses,”
Abbott pledged that Texas,
or its GOP leadership anyway,
was working to thwart Biden’s “power grab.”
And here’s where the tragicomic
part comes in.
“I issued an Executive Order
protecting Texans’
right to choose
whether they get the COVID vaccine
Added it to the special session agenda,”
If you’ve been paying attention,
you’re then aware
that Abbott’s tweet trumpeting
Texans’ right
to make individual health choices,
comes days after he signed a law.
banning the majority
of abortions in the state.
Abbott is talking
out both sides of his mouth
when it comes to matters of choice.”
Comment:
The irony meters
Have blown a gasket
You talk about the right to choose
The right to not get vaccinated
Or wear a mask.
You know that is the right
To infect everyone else
Including you
You and your family could die.
Because of idiots
Who refuse to get a vaccination
Or wear a mask.
The blood is on your hands
Own it.
The corona ghosts
Are watching you.
Governor Abbot, what is Wrong with You?
Governor.
I want to ask you a very simple question
about your opposition to mass mandates
and vaccination requirements,
and your saying people have a right to choose
not to get vaccinated, or wear a mask.
what is wrong with you?
Right now,
in this country,
COVID is spreading out of control/
especially in Texas and Florida,
and a few other states
where the vaccination rate is fairly low
and people have abandoned wearing masks.
People are dying
Because so many people
Refuse to do the right thing.
Get a vaccine
Wear a mask
Avoid crowds
If everyone did their part
The pandemic would be soon over.
But if people
Continue to follow your guidance
Acting like the self-centered scumbag
That we now see you are,
Thousands more will die
The economy will not re-open
Travel will not resume.
Perhaps more dangerous variants
Will emerge.
And it is all on you
Governor Abbot.
Just man up,
Admit you were wrong
Encourage people to shut up.
Get the vaccine
And save your state
And country.
The corona ghosts
Are watching you!
Evil
Evil in this world
lurks in the deadliest places.
Evil came to town on 911
the day that evil swept over the world
a true Black Swan event
that transformed everything
splitting the world into a pre-9-11 world
and a post 9-11 world
unleashing the War on Terror, the wars in Afghanistan, the wars in Iraq, the war in Libya, the war in Syria, the wars in Africa, the horrors of ISIS, the horrors of the Taliban resurgent, the horrors of Al Qaeda and all the rest of the Muslim terrorists, the war in the streets of any big city, the war on Muslims, the war on Christians, the war on Jews, the apartheid in Palestine, the wars on dissent at home, the Arab Spring
so many things can be traced
to the impact of 9/11
one of the most unlikely events
of recent history
that transformed
everything
yes there was a pre-9-11 world
hard to imagine now
and a post 9-11 worldwide police state
on steroids
lost democracy at home
and abroad
we are still coping
with the damages unleashed
by the evil plane bombers
fulfilling their mad desires
their dictates from their mad God
transforming the world
unleashing evil
on the once innocent world.
the End
2
20
20
20
